I would guarantee that you hold yourself back every day, that you put the brakes on your goals and ambitions by telling yourself that you’re not ready yet, that nobody will be interested in what you have to say or that someone like you could never do whatever the thing is.
If you ever keep quiet when you want to speak up, put up with a crap job for the money/because there’s nothing else out there/whatever you tell yourself or let other people take advantage of you then you’re holding yourself back.
If there are things you really want to do and choices you really want to make, but you don’t ever act on them then you’re holding yourself back.
We all have limiting beliefs. We all think we can’t or that we’re not good enough or the time isn’t right nd those are precisely the beliefs that keep us stuck.
Here are some of the things you may think that keep limiting what you can achieve:
• I don’t have time or I’m lazy
• I can’t stand up for myself
• If I work hard someone will notice and then I’ll get that promotion or pay rise. They may notice but you probably won’t get the promotion or pay rise unless you ask.
• I don’t ever finish anything or I’m too disorganised
• I worry about what other people will think
• People like me never [do the thing you want to do]
• I don’t do sales
It is hard and can be very uncomfortable to dig into limiting beliefs but you will only make progress if you acknowledge that you can be your own worst enemy. Here are some supplementary questions that will help you dig more deeply into how you can sabotage yourself.
How do I limit myself and how can I stop?
Think of all the ways, especially the self-doubt and self-criticism.
What has it cost me to limit myself?
This may be money, bad relationships, self-respect, career progression, business success, fulfilment, your health, personal satisfaction or many other things.
How have I benefited from limiting myself?
This may seem like a strange question but some part of you will get some benefit from you holding yourself back. You might feel safer in your comfort zone, or prefer an easy life, or enjoy people thinking you’re lovely. You may prefer not to rock the boat and just not have to deal with stuff. All of these things, and more besides, are benefits of limiting yourself.
Am I willing to stop limiting myself?
Yes or No. It’s as simple as that. If it’s yes, I’ll help you. Go here and book a free session. It’s not a sales call, don’t worry, it’s a 1:1 coaching session to help you get started on having your best year yet. If you want more sessions we’ll talk about it, but if you just want the freebie that’s totally fine.
Adapted from Jinny Ditzler’s ‘Your Best Year Yet’.